So now you are at the stage in the Christian dating online sites with your interests all chalked out and your profiles posted. Pretty soon, someone will want to start a conversation. So what happens next?
Remember, the internet is like any other highway. It’s not safe until you get to know your way around. So trust God’s voice and proceed with caution.
Precautions To Be Done In A Online Dating Website:
First, for privacy’s sake, let them know that you would prefer to be known by your user name. If it’s a little awkward to use in conversation, you might want to choose the name of a celebrity. You could call yourself Cinderella, Wonder Woman, Rachel, Ross, Chandler—the possibilities are endless. Whatever you do, keep the information exchange very general in the beginning and stay away from the specific. And here’s another tip–take some notes.
The human brain is a remarkable thing. It’s capable of storing and processing a wide range of information. But because of all this information, our memories can be very selective. This means we can’t recollect everything we hear or see.
Don’t trust your memory when it comes to chatting over the net. You’re going to meet a lot of single Christians and chat with many of them. And at some point, it may become difficult to remember all the details.
Getting confused and mixing up details can be very embarrassing. That’s why, after chatting with a number of people, jot down the details about each person. Or better yet, create separate files for each person on your computer.
In case you really can’t remember someone, don’t play the guessing game. They might get very offended if you say something like, “It’s Sarah, right? Or is it Mary?”
If you do have a genuine lapse of memory, the best thing is to be honest with the person and say, “I know we chatted the other day, but I’m terribly sorry, can you please refresh my memory about you?” If they’re a person of character, they’ll appreciate your honesty.
4 Ways To Tell If A Christian Online Dating Suitor Is Lying:
So you’re being truthful in your Christian dating online site, but how can you tell if the other person is lying?
The web can be a very unsafe place. We have to be absolutely certain about the good faith of the other person before revealing any personal details. Here are a few tips to help you with this.
· One very effective way of finding out if a person is lying is to ask them very pointed questions about a specific interest you’re familiar with. If they fumble or gives vague answers, then this is a warning sign.
· Another thing you could do is jot down whatever details they choose to reveal from the very start. Then, in subsequent encounters, nonchalantly question them about the details. If there is a definite contradiction, they’re probably lying.
· Ask them seemingly general questions which in fact have a very definite purpose. For example, ask what he or she is looking for in a relationship. Write down the answer. After two or three encounters, repeat the question again and see whether the answers match.
· Above all, trust the Lord in these situations. He knows every person’s heart and their true desire. If you’re tuned into His voice, he’ll set off the warning bells if something’s not right. And if that happens, obey! No matter how good the relationship has gone so far. There’s someone else out there who’s better for you, and God knows it—trust Him!
And so the chatting goes on and things are going smoothly. When you feel you can really trust them, it might be time to move to phone conversations.
Talking over the phone is another step towards intimacy, so my advice is to start with a pay phone rather than with your home phone. A lot of personal information can be gleaned from your phone number. Remember, this is a giant leap towards building a relationship so it’s better to be safe than sorry.
It’s really no big deal, and you can afford to tell them that you’re just being wary. They should understand. If they don’t, then there’s a good chance that they won’t understand a lot of other things as well. In that case, dump the relationship and move on.